New relationships at risk for the divorced and cohabiters
Anne-Rigt Poortman, a Netherlands researcher, has been examining patterns of marriage, cohabitation, divorce, and repartnering, with and without children from previous relationships, and has a number of findings to report. She found that after separating or divorcing, the chances of remarrying or cohabiting again decrease, particularly for women. She speculates that this is because women are more cautious after having been hurt by a failed marriage; while others surmise that society and potential mates perceive such women less favourably.
Societal patterns worldwide have changed dramatically over the past several decades, and this research is examining the effects on relationship numbers and longevity. For instance, many people are entering the marriage market not only once, but two, three or more times, following relationship breakdowns. Poortman investigated, in particular, the effects of repeated relationships on any future relationships.
Not surprisingly she found that the chances of a new relationship are particularly small for women if they have already been married, or have children from a previous relationship. She found that divorcees, in general, prefer not to consider living with a new partner, but that women who co-habited without marriage before would like to do so again. The survey could not determine the reason for the difference in attitudes between these two groups, however.
And although separated or divorced people still believe they want a partner as much as ever they are reportedly very wary of the commitment of remarriage and prefer to have less formal arrangements, such as remaining in their own separate homes, or cohabiting rather than marrying.
Divorced men and women who do remarry often have as their new partner someone who has also been divorced. In fact the researcher came to see the ‘market’ for first marriages as distinctly different to the later market for divorcees to meet and repartner. She found that, in general, older divorced people are much more likely to only meet and socialise with other older divorced people.
The success of any new relationship is greatly influenced by previous experiences of both partners. Norwegian data, for instance, show that people who have already been divorced once are much more likely to divorce again. Another study reported in the Journal of Marriage and Family found that serial cohabiters are much less likely to marry, and if they do their divorce rates are very high.
Daniel T Lichter and Zhenchao used data from the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth to report that choosing to serially cohabit was a pattern more likely to be found among economically disadvantaged groups, especially those with low income and little education. Although this is academic research devised and written from a secular point of view it has elements of interest to Christians as we observe the changes in our society, and support all efforts to proclaim and maintain marriage as a sacred union between one man and one woman, as intended by God.
References: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/09/070925092516.htm, http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/11/081106153544.htm